Experience tells us that a family going through divorce is a family in crisis – the cost of which is borne by children. When you first contemplate divorce you must begin to make decisions that will seriously impact your family’s future. One of the first decisions that you must make is how you are going to pursue divorce. That decision, at least in part, should be based upon the effect that the process you chose will have upon your children. Your choices are self-representation (divorce without assistance), litigation or mediation.

Because of the complexity of matrimonial law, the complexity of issues addressed in divorce, and the duties and obligations assigned, self-representation, although your right, is not recommended. Because self-representation poses an unacceptable risk, your choices remain litigation or mediation.

Divorce by litigation is by its very nature costly, hostile, confrontational, argumentative, and counterproductive to resolution. More importantly litigation serves to further fracture an already fractured relationship making it more difficult, if not impossible, for your family to move forward through the difficult times of divorce to the healing process. Litigation is also problematic because it takes control away from those who most need it – you. It’s your family; you know your strengths, weaknesses, personalities, children’s’ needs, and financial capabilities – it’s you that should be making the decisions on how best to move your family forward through the crisis of divorce to recovery, not disinterested third parties who have no real interests in your family’s future. Mediation, on the other hand, is cost effective, non-confrontational and most importantly self-determinative; meaning that the outcome, as it should be, is determined by you. Mediation remains - the sane alternative to contentious litigation.